squidbillies granny quotes
Early: Wait a minute!

Rusty: Ain't nuthin gonna stop me now but my innate inabilitree to progress cognatious thunk. Earlie Cuyler: [sniffles] And a son has done been imparted with the knowledge of a father. World's most appropriately named mountain in the South East. Earlie Cuyler: You lucky bitch! Granny: [Aunt Lil is dancing with Rusty] Oh, you two are just the cutest. 'Cause now I'm pissed. Favorite Squidbillies quotes. Aunt Lil: Back off you old bitch!


[indicating poisonous cloud killing the townspeople]. (Begins to nudge the Sheriff out of the way). That's the slogan.

(Whips off shirt and throws it off the cliff) Whew, well, that felt pretty good.

How many times, Rusty? I'm the law.

Guess who I just apprehended in town.

Dan Halen: Denny, I highly doubt that.

Granny: When I was little, we didn't have fancy ketchup.

I done tell you once, you son-of-a-bitch, I'm the best that's ever been! Squidbillies: The Genius That Is Early Cuyler - Words And Wisdom. — Granny (voice) , Squidbillies , Season 1 : This Show Is Called Squidbillies. Early: Yes granny - I seen the light.

Earlie Cuyler: I do apprecinate the generous offer, but knifery is the tool of an idiot. The series is about the Cuyler family, an impoverished family of anthropomorphic hillbilly mud squids living in the Georgia region of the Blue Ridge Mountains.

Originally he wanted his second oldest son Durwood to take over his Mountain Dance business, the unfortunate Durwood however was totally untalented so GaGa had to use Early instead.

She suffers from various health problems, including a failing gallbladder, but doesn't die which could be due to her repeated attempts to hit-on Squid Jesus, who at one point ordered angels to restore her to life just so he wouldn't have to deal with her or her unwanted advances. In "Holodeck Redneck", her holographic fantasy is killing herself with a shotgun and being buried in the cemetery. Ain't dat da damn place where they got all dem uhh lets see, whatcha call um uhh? Granny also seems to know about Halloween Monsters.

You've arrested a fish... and your car. But I pulled a U-ie and hauled ass through the woods! Aunt Lil: Oh I'm afraid this handsome fella here is taken. Earlie Cuyler: You never get scored as a parent; like in bowling.

Cause then I would receive the gold medal for love. Without us they have no network... Sheriff: ...often wondered if I even do have a pair! There have been a total of 114 episodes during the show's 11 seasons.

Wait a minute, this is stupid, get outta the fire, everyone outta the fire!"

Description Edit. Dan Halen: ...and why would you? She is Rusty, Lil and Early's ancestor, but exactly how she is related is unknown for sure. Chalky Trouble/Quotes | Squidbillies Wiki | Fandom You mind if I steal him for just a little bit of this dance? Earlie Cuyler: Here you go, boy. The series revolves around the exploits of an alcoholic father (Early), who is often abusive in a comedic way towards his family. Once them deers smell that birthday cake them sumbitches will come a running. Ain't I gonna get to yell nothin'? I did! It's 'em yellow things inside make it taste good. four automatic transmission fluid to excite my mind, occupy my spirits, and enrage my body, provoking me to kick any man or woman in the back of the head regardless of what he or she has or has not done unto me. Granny Cuyler is the tritagonist of Squidbillies. It is also implied that she has an incestuous relationship with Lil (also apparently without consent), and has encouraged Rusty to scratch her genitalia. He'll be a world famous trucker. Rusty: I did? Masturbation... uh... let's just call it a hiatus. Earlie Cuyler: Oh, and what's your saggy mouth gonna say about it? We'll add the word "Dawg" for the blacks.

Favorite Squidbillies quotes. Earlie Cuyler: What did I tell you about drinking underneath the age, huh? The boat is mine.

Earlie Cuyler: Damn it! Early: Uh, yeah, something has been kinda gnawing at me.

Earlie Cuyler: Well, I don't think ethnics do no work.

Early: I done tell you once, you son-of-a-bitch, I'm the best that's ever been!

But you leave the boat to me. They, they all blasphemous. He later returns as a ghost in Season 8, in the episode "Ga-Ga-Ghost".

Gunnery, you have a good'un!

I will kill you.

He is mine!

Sheriff: Looks like they found out your name wasn't Awesome Bill from Dawsomeville.

Earlie Cuyler: What's it on like? I'm trying to watch my stories. Dan Halen: Another dead baby? "Squidbillies Quotes."

I'll start: ... Granny: "Everyone get in the fire, it's the only way!

She became famous for giving handjobs to different slave owners in secret.

Earlie Cuyler: She was my dream, my muse. Or maybe I'll spot him one night in the battle cage. I mean who's your daddy? All my Best, Earlie Cuyler. Granny: Yeah, it's on!

Santa: I won't bring you the still-beating heart of Jeff Gordon! Rusty: Hey daddy how do I do a breast self exam? Earlie Cuyler: No, no, Tangerine, boy.

I said Adult Literature!

Narrator: Early's tenure as CEO of Dan Halen International had not been long, but it had been distinguished... By drunkenness, hair-trigger violence, and a total lack of performance.

This act forces Early to stupidly kill himself to get the money but they still can't get the money. Rusty: Oh, Lord, I'm sorry, Sheriff. Quotes.net. Aunt Lil: Oh I'm afraid this handsome fella here is taken. Thank you. Earlie Cuyler: I do appreciate the generous offer, but knife here is the tool of the idiot. Rusty: Wait a minute, this the place where Kenny Rogers shot that scene with the kids of Six Pack, ain't it?

3 Nov. 2020. Earlie Cuyler: Shhh!

"Boy, I told you about dippin into my date rape drugs!"

She is prone to becoming confused about her current situation and whereabouts due to her extreme senile dementia. Them people can't wipe they ass without me. How many times have we watched Road House this weekend? He opens his eyes to see his son Rusty standing over him saying "Boop... boop... boop..."). But as she reveals more about her background, this may be due the fact that she was an unreliable narrator as many details are changed and forgotten the more she talks. And now my life has purpose. We'll do it this way--Russell, get me my straight razor. Squidbillies Wiki is a FANDOM TV Community. He figures this out as the the bus carries him to a realm of fire and is last seen screaming as he goes down the hole that soon closes.

His BB gun is based off the Daisy Red Ryder series. What's next, they're goin' to try to take it out of our schools? Earlie Cuyler: You want to sleep forever? Early: "I ain't goin' no where.....cept' hell. I'll find you! Granny: Ablomandelebicus, Pentoculus, Benturpenoise, Farntormion, Crisco, Dophenecta, Glabbafontonion, Smectarufus, Fontanox, Chicken Dance, Trenoctor, Pontallafamarion, Tudonox, Mellicanisis! Sheriff: (Kicks Early away) Don't you push me! Earlie Cuyler: Hell no. loading next page... “That's all there is; there isn't anymore.” —Ethel Barrymore. ", It is hinted that Ga Ga may in fact be Early and Lil's father, as when he came back as a ghost, Early called him "Daddy" instead of grandpa so he may instead be their biological father and may have had a incestuous relationship with Granny. Krystal: Are you sure it's not Charlie Sheen? [points to mouth] Fights begin, finger prints are took, days is lost, bail is made, court dates are ignored, cycle is repeated.

"'Granny"':It's a trap! Well, guess what!


You see those deers is going to think this ain't nothin but a common Georgia fruit tree. Oh I was a fool to plant my nanners on a mountain, you made sure of that. We used to make it out in the back out of opossum tails.

Okay, you got to tell him it's on! I listen to my gut and my gut tells me that this ain't a fit, but my heart says this could work and gut's a damn moron, so they get to carring on and then my brain chimes in and saying I got to try my hand at the fast second pace world of adult literture. Pretty, pretty chiffon! At some point, she was found and worked as a slave who picked cotton on Dan Halen's plantation in the 1800's. And you break the law and you still expect me to be your friend?

(Yells off cliff) Show me them titties!


", "Floss is a conspiracy by the American Indians... Now we're gettin' into my beliefs system. Like a DUI roadblock in the sky. Narrator: Nothing binds a father and a son more closely than the truth behind the decapitated hooker in the rec room. Read the entire Squidbillies show script », https://www.quotes.net/show/squidbillies,_season_2_quotes_1520. Early: I'm against mens kissin mens, for any reason, but when womerns do it... [coughs]... That, uh, that seems alright.


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